Second Chance
by NHS.Basketball.5
Summary: What happens when your past comes to haunt you? Can someone save you this time around? First FF. RxR
1. Chapter 1

It's been two weeks and I still don't get this town or school. It's always non-stop action. It's a type of crazy madness. Kid's here are always doings something or going somewhere. I just got here and don't do anything close to what these people do. I hang with my step sister a lot, or I used to until she joined the cheerleading squad. She has been trying so hard to make me join the basketball team, but it's useless. I saw their practice a couple days ago. It was so intense and I'm nowhere near that level.

"Ash come on. It will be good for you."

"No, Kyla. I don't want to play. You didn't see what happened last time."Kyla got quite. I guess the way I drifted off my words gave her the hint. We walked in silence for a few minutes.

"Please, Ash, It will be good for you and me to see you do something you love."

"I'll think about it, but I'm not promising anything."She gives me a hug that could kill. "Kyla, too hard."

"Sorry… sorry." She gives me a concerned look, "oh I have to get to class early. Really cute boy."

"Then go. I'll see you later." It's been two weeks and she has everything figured out about this crazy town and the way everything works around here. I place my head phones in my ears and place my iPod on shuffle. I look up from the screen and see the Carlin brothers. I may have only been here two weeks but if there was anything I had learned it was that they were the most popular kids in school and you mess with one you mess with them all. The oldest is Glen. He is tall, not the best looking, but cute, blonde hair, and blue eyes. He is King High's basketball and soccer star. Then Clay is all about the academics and grades. He is also adopted and he is bald, but it suits him very well. The youngest is Spencer. She is about my height, long blonde hair, baby blue eyes and a smile to kill .She is the soccer, track, and basketball star as well as good grades. Their parents are no different. Their mom is a well respected and successful surgeon and their father has never lost a case as a lawyer. 'Bang'

"Ouch. Shit." Yeah I just walked straight into a locker door.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah… um I'm good. Just zoned out a little bit."

"A little bit?" The other girl laughs a little.

"Yeah, I guess I zoned out really badly huh."

"Just a tad," We both laugh. "I'm Spencer Carlin"

"I'm Ashley Davis"

"Are you new here?"

"Yeah, me and my step sister just moved here from Ohio a few weeks ago."

"That's cool. Who is your sister?"

"Kyla Woods."

"That's your sister?"  
"Yeah. Is that bad or something?"

"She's a good cheerleader. They say she could take over Madison's head cheerleading position. You might want to watch yourself."

"Thanks for the warning but, no one here knows I exist. I think I'm safe for now."She smiles a little bit.

"Do you play any sports or do any clubs?"

"I used to, but not now."

"What did you play?"She likes to ask question but, I guess that's why she is so smart.

"Basketball. That's it."

"Why did you quit?"

"Just some family this came up."

"Oh. That sucks. Ever think about playing again?"

"Kyla wants me to try out I just don't know if I'm good enough."

"Well you should. You never know and we could use some new people and talent."

"I'll think about it. But I need to get to class."

"Alright see ya Ashley."

"Bye Spencer."

I place my head phones in my ears and walk to class. Mere inches from the door and the bell rings."Late again Davis." I just sit in my seat and stare out the window. "Homework Davis?"

"What?"

"Your homework. You've been her two weeks and you have done nothing in my class."

"So what? Less work for you, less work for me. It's my grade not yours."

"Outside."

I grab my book bag and go sit in the desk outside. It's become my second set basically. I set my bag on the ground next to me and I begin to scribble down a few words and some random pictures onto some paper, listening to music and enjoying my own thoughts.

"What are you doing?"

"Say what?" I look up and see Kyla standing in front of me. Great.

"Why aren't you in class?"I take out my ear buds and give her a glare.

"Because mom, I was late and I didn't have my homework." I get ready to her Kyla scream. She doesn't like me calling her mom.

"Why were you late? You said you did your homework last night. You lied to me."

"I was talking to someone after you left."

"Wait you found a friend? You know I'm worried about you not being sociable."

"Yes, I know you are but, no, not a friend. I ran into a locker and she asked if I was okay. Why aren't you in class?"

"I'm running some letters around for my teacher. Who was it?"

"It was no one."

"Ashley… Oh. Kyla," the teacher came out of the class to talk to me, "Ashley why can't you be more like Kyla? She is bright, smart and active in school."

"Maybe, 'cause I'm not her."

"Well… actually," Kyla started and I do not like where this is heading,"Ashley is going to try out for the basketball team."

"Wait. What?"

"Oh really now. It's about time you do something with your life Ashley. I'll be there after school at practice. Can't wait to see you there." The teacher walked back into the class room and shut the door. Kyla was watching her and could tell I was already giving her the worst death stare I could manage.


	2. Chapter 2

"Sorry Ash but were you really just going to let her walk all over her like that?"

"Yes, Kyla. I was. Now I have no choice."

"I'm sorry… I just think it will be good for you and besides you aren't in trouble now."

"Look just let it go. I'll go there on one condition though and only if you do this one thing will I go."

"Anything."

"Go home and grab my shoes hanging in m closet and my old basketball sorts and a cut off t."

"But that means skipping!"

"Do it or I won't go."

"Fine… If I get caught you're dead."

"Don't get caught then." Kyla walks off a little pissed off but, she'll give it over it. The bell rings signaling the end of class. Study hall is the same old same old. Kids don't do anything but text and mess around. I sit in my seat and draw and write. Surprisingly this is one of the only classes I don't get in trouble. Sometimes the teacher will show us videos or play music to try and get the class to calm down but, it rarely works. As soon as that class is over I head off to my third period class.

Video Arts is the other class I do pay attention in. We just watch videos and write about them. Not so hard. As soon as the bell rings the teacher, Mr. Collins, begins speaking. "Class we…" I drown him out still doing what I do best. Drawing and writing. Then I hear my name.

"Wait. What?"

"Well Ashley," he stated, "If you were pay attention you would know that we have a new student in our class now and her seat is next to you. She's right there Miss Carlin," he said pointing at me. Carlin? As in Spencer Carlin? I really wonder why she is in this class now. She sits next to me as she smiles at me. Mr. Collins finishes the movie we were watching and tells us to continue notes. I just keep to myself going back to what I was previously doing. I have seen Mean Girls enough times. I start to feel a warm touch on my arm. I look over and Spencer is handing me a note.

_Hey. How's your forehead? _

_Good. Thanks. _

_That's good._

_How did you get into this class anyways?_

_I had study hall with a teacher who hates me and kicked me out.__Have you thought about trying out for basketball any?_

_Oh ok. And Kyla told my first period teacher I was trying out so now I'm stuck._

_Do you like just carry basketball gear around in your car or something?_

_No. I'm making Kyla skip something to go get them from the house since this was her brilliant idea. _

_That's actually really funny. Doesn't she have a perfect record since like kindergarten?_

_She did. She got the chicken pox and miss one day in second grade and still hates the kid who gave it to her?_

_How do you know she still hates that kid?_

_She tells me she hates me every day. :)_

"Ok class. We're going to get into groups of two or three after, after I stop talking." Spencer looks over and quietly asks me to be her partner. I nod to agree. "Now here's the catch. This project will be a film about your life as you grow throughout you're sophomore year here at King High. This will mean that you have until the last two weeks of school to film as much as you can. The highlights of your year, the break ups, the drama, and the down falls. Tell us a story about you and have fun with it. We will be doing other work on top of this though." Mr. Collins claps his hands together signaling he was done. This is going to be a fun project and my partner is Spencer. The most popular girl at King high, straight A student. We're bound to do really well on this. We all talk quietly about the project and ideas well all have of how to do it.

"Hey let me get your number so I can call you about this tonight if that's ok," Spencer asks.

"Yeah sure," I write my number on a piece of paper and hand it to her, "here you go."

"Cool. Thanks." The bell rings and we all get up to leave. "I'll see you later at basketball right?"

"Yup, I should be there I guess." I forgot about basketball. I'm not looking forward to this one bit. I walk off to my fourth period art class. It's nice right before lunch. I'm not a great artist but I try. Today were supposed to be drawing something that means something to us. I start to draw a guitar with music notes coming out of it but it looks like a third grader could have done it. Eh… oh well. I look to my left and I see this girl who has done an entire mountain seen. All the trees and rocks are to perfection and there is even a river included. The sun is setting and is flied with lots of yellows, oranges, and a splash of pink and red. It's really incredible. The teacher has come over and is looking at what I had accomplished.

"Not so much of an artist like her, are you Davis?"

"She is amazing. There's no way I could do that."

"Just practice," he says laughing a little. "Why not take a canvas home and work there for a bit and bring it back when it's done."

"You'd let m do that?"

"Why not? There's something about you that intrigues me. You could be famous one day if you practice." He lets me take the canvas to my car before class is let out so I won't be late for lunch. When I get back the bell rings which means nothing else but, food. My favorite time of the day. Minus the whole sitting on my own thing.


	3. Chapter 3

I grab my lunch and decide to sit out in the quad. I sit in the corner in the shade. I begin to eat my salad and my phone goes off.  
**You look lonely.  
**I don't recognize the number but I decide to text it back anyways. What can it hurt?  
**Who is this? –Ash.  
It's Spencer. Do you want some company?**  
A smile appears on my face as l look around the quad for her. She is sitting with her two brothers, a guy in a baseball uniform and another girl in a cheerleading outfit, but she is facing me.**Yeah, sure. I'd like that. –Ash **  
I see her get up from her table and friends. They seemed a little pissed she was leaving but it didn't stop her. "Hey," I say as she sits down next to me."Hey. Why are you by yourself?"  
"Kyla is still getting my stuff and other than that I don't know.""Do you not have friends or something? Not to be mean though.""It's fine and no not really. Kyla has been my only friend but now she is becoming popular and hanging out with some boy.""Oh. That sucks but I got a proposition for you that might make you feel better.""Okay. What is that?""Well, you are my partner for the video project and you're possibly playing basketball, right?""Sounds about right, yeah.""Well what if I sat with you every day since we're going to need to get to know each other anyways?" she smiled at me while asking."Yeah, I'd like that.""Okay cool." My phone starts to go off with a new text.**I hate you… ? Lol – Ash.I got caught. ky. ** I started cracking up."What is so funny?" Spencer curiously asks why I'm laughing."Kyla go caught skipping lunch." Now we both start laughing. We look over and we see Kyla and a teacher walking into the principal's office. She looks like she could kill right about now. At least she got my stuff."That has to suck. Is she going to yell when you get home?" Spencer asks still laughing a little."Yeah, I don't doubt that. But she's the one who said I was playing basketball." "This is true. I know it would be ragi0gn war at my house if one of u did that to the other.""We'll probably settle it like we do everything else.""Really? How is that?""Pillow fights, paint ball, water guns, or wrestling. It depends on whose turn it is to pick the event" I say like it happens that often. Which it does. At least three times a week."Wow. You guys have it all figured out don't you?""Yeah we basically do.""Who gets to pick this time?""Eh. It's hers sadly. I love to play paintball when it's my turn only bacuse she hates it and she always loses."  
"That is awesome. I wish my parents would let us do stuff like that when we argued.""My parents are never there so they really don't care what we do.""That's sad but cool in a way. You can do whatever you want and not get into trouble.""Yeah I know, but when my mom comes back for a day she only bitches at us and stuff. It really sucks.""Wow. That must. I'm sorry.""It's okay. She comes home maybe once every three months.""Well that's good." The bell rings signaling for us to go to sixth period. "Hey do you want to hang out after practice tonight?""Yeah sure. I'd like that.""Okay cool. I'll see you later.""Alright. See ya." As I'm walking to class I think about what is going to happen with basketball tonight. Are the flashbacks going to come back? Am I going to be good enough? Will they accept me? All of these thoughts just come racing threw my head all at once giving me a major headache. While thinking and spacing out, Kyla caught up to me."Hello! Ashley?""Huh? Oh. Hey.""Here's your stuff," she says handing them to me but I'm still spacing out. "Are you alright?""Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking I guess.""Well don't try too hard. You'll run into something again.""Yeah I know. Thanks Ky." She walks off going to her next class as well. I thought she was going to yell at me or at least bring up the fact she got caught but she didn't. I'm beinging to think she can read my mind or something.


	4. Chapter 4

At the end of the day I realize that Spencer is actually in two more of my class, English and science. I'm sitting in my 9th period study all when my phone starts to vibrate.

**Do you want to walk to basketball together?**

**Yeah sure. --Ash **

**Ok cool. Meet me by my locker after class.2534D****. **

**I can do that –Ash.**

The bell rings and I go to find Spencer's locker and she is already there with her stuff. "Are you ready to go?" she asks me with a smile on her face.

"As ready as I'll ever be, I guess."

"Alright cool." We quietly walk over to the gym. This being my first time there and all. I being to stare at all the pictures as we walk by them in the halls. I stop when we come to the record board. The only thing you really see is that last name Carlin. They have crushed every sport except baseball where you see the last name Dennison come up multiple times. "What are you looking at?" Spencer stops to notice that I'm starring at the board.

"Your family is crazy," is the only thing I can get to come out of my mouth at the time. "You guys broke ever known record to this school."

"Yeah basically."

"Who is this Dennison guy for baseball?"

"Oh him. His first name is Aiden. He used to be the basketball star until my brother came her and so he switched to the one sport my brother can't take which is baseball."

"Wow. That's incredible. So he was the other guy you were with at lunch. He seemed pretty upset you left to sit with me."

"Well, he has a crush on me and has for the past two years and won't let it go. I've told him no at least twenty times."

"Why do you keep saying no?"

"Well…cause. I'm just not really into him I guess."

"You like someone else don't you."

"Not until recently did I start to like…like someone."

"Oh. Does he like you back?"

"Uh… That's what I'm trying to find out," she smiles at me and laughs a little. I laugh back.

We walk in silence to the locker room. We place on stuff down on a bench in front of an empty locker. Apparently they get assigned after try outs are over. We're the only ones in here for right now since it doesn't start for another hour, but Spencer convinced me to come early and warm up with her and to 'see what I got' I think is how she worded it. The thoughts of my past keep lingering around in my head. All the what if's knowing that it can't happen again. But still, what if it happens to someone else in my life. I couldn't live with it again. I quickly snap out of my thoughts are realize that Spencer is already dressed and placing her shoes on. I'm still in my clothes from school. I quickly take off my shirt and pants and notice that Spencer has stopped lacing up her shoes and is staring at me. I quickly look around for something on me because I have no clue what she is starring at.

"Is there something on me?" I ask not being able to find anything. She shakes her head no but is still looking at me.

"You just have a really nice toned body is all." She goes back to her shoes as I through on my cut off and shorts. As I slip my shoes on I notice Spencer has left me without saying a word. I tie my shoes and go look around the corners and I can't find her. I go look in the bathroom and she still isn't there. When I turn around There Spencer Scaring the crap out of me.

"Oh my god Spencer!" She starts cracking up so hard and I about pee my pants.

"Are you ready to go?" she asks wiping a tear from her eye. It really wasn't all that funny, for me at least. I nod my head and we go up to the court with two basketballs. She begins shooting around and I join her. She is nailing threes left and right and I'm two feet from the basket banking them in. I feel like a dork right about now.

"Why don't we play a game of pig?"

"Yeah sure. Let's boost your confidence in you trees just a little bit more." I say joking around. She thankfully gets the sarcasm in my voice.

"You go first." I shoot a regular shot and make it. She shoots the same shot I do and swishes it. We go back in forth for about twenty minutes. I'm on the last letter of horse and she is only on the h. I go out to half court to hopefully make it and not lose just yet. I go and shoot it like a normal shot and as we wait to see if it goes in my first period teacher walks in but not enough to be noticed. Spencer and I are still watching the ball as it goes through the hoop in a swish. My teacher stand in amazement as do Spencer and I.

"Wow. I don't think I can top that one." Spencer says to me. I can tell by her voice she has made these before as mine was just luck. Spencer goes and stand where I previously was and puts up the shot and also swishes it in. We finish the game by her nailing another half court and me completely air balling it. My teacher, Mrs. Drews, comes out of hiding behind the wall.

"Ashley, can I talk with you real quick?" she asks in a curious voice. I'm a little nervous right about now.

"Yeah sure."

"If you knew you couldn't make the half point shot why did you try it the first time?"

"Well you never really know what could happen if you try." I say back like a duh question.

"Exactly Ashley. I want you to apply that concept in all of your homework now that I know you can do things you place your mind to." I think about what she has told me and what I had just said. I realize that I really can do what I put my mind to. She walks away from me realizing she had me thinking and that was all she wanted me to do.

I go back to Spencer and few other girls who had shown up. We being with partner warm ups and Spencer goes with me and her normal partner is a little upset. I think they said her name was Carmen or something like that. We do simple drill like passing and two ball dribbling to work with our no domestic hand. It wasn't so hard for me since I'm ambidextrous and Spencer had done it some much it was like easy for her as well but other girls had major problems and balls where everywhere.

About half way through the try out we play a four on four pickup game. Me and Spencer are on the same team. She plays point and I play a wing. Carmen is on the other team and Spencer is guarding her. We start to play and I'm still nervous about playing. It's been a few years and I'm afraid to mess up or have 'issues' come back. We start up and then Mrs. Drews decides to stop the game.

"Spencer and Ashley, switch positions. I want to see how Ashley does at point." We switch places and I can tell that Carmen is pissed off at me for some reason or another. She checks it up and just by the way she throws the ball to me I can tell it's going to be bad.


	5. Chapter 5

I throw the ball back to her and without any warning Carmen takes off to the left, shoulder checks me and makes an easy basket. I can tell she is going to try and put me in my place quickly. Spencer gives her a glare but Carmen pretends to not see it.

We check it up again ad she does the same thing just to the right and stronger. This is the last time it will happen. I'm not messing around on this one. We check it up once more and she gives me a smirk and starts to dribble with her left hand. She comes to penetrate on the left but crosses over and as she crosses over at the exact right moment I use my right and swipe the ball away and Carmen trips forward looking dumb this time.

I take the ball back to the top of the key and I give her a smirk as to say 'you messed with the wrong girl'. A little competition never hurt anyone, I begin to drive to the hoop with my right cross over behind the back straight up to the basket, do a one-eighty and kick the ball out to Spencer who was waiting for the three. I put the shot up and swishes it in. No one on the team can believe what is going on right now.

"Girls water break," Mrs. Drews quickly calls out before something bad happens. "Ashley come here real quick please." I run over to her as the feeling of people starring comes to my back. "Ashley that…. that…. was just amazing. No one other than Spencer, who is our best player, has ever done that to Carmen. But be warned Although Spencer is our best player; Carmen is the one who calls. I didn't place you on her to make the team hate you just so you know though."

"It's alright," I say drifting my word off again.

"Are you alright?" she asks me but I'm not sure if I am ready to explain my situation to anyone.

"Yeah I'm alright." I say quietly. A small tear escapes my eye. Mrs. Drews can tell I'm lying.

"Spencer come over here please." Spencer looks over from Carmen who is yelling at her for one thing or another but just leaves her hanging and runs over to us. "Take her to the locker room until she is better please." Spencer and I walk off the court and into the locker room.

We both sit down in silence and she knows something is wrong but she doesn't push it or ask questions.

"I'm sorry." I say finally in a small voice.

"For what?" She asks as she leans forward placing some of my fallen bangs behind my ear."

I just didn't mean to cause problems and now that Carmen girl is yelling at you and I'm taking you away from practice."

"It's okay Ashley. None of this is your fault. Carmen got shown up by an amazing girl and she knows not to judge new people by their appearances, especially if coach places them as point right of the bat."

"How do you know she knows that?" I ask now very curious.

"I arrived late in the year last year." She smiles at me and I understand exactly what she is telling me. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah sure."

"Why are you crying?"

"It's just… I… It's hard to explain."

"Alright just don't let the others see you like this. They'll prey on you if they do. And I'm right here if you need anything." She places her hand on my knee and I get a sensation running up and down my leg. "Come on. Let's go kick some ass."

She stands up and gives me a hand up. We head up to the court and we see that they're just doing some basic drills and I and Spencer join in until the end of practice.

"Hey are we still hanging out?" Spencer asks as we walk down to the locker room with the team.

"Yeah. Where are we going?"

"That's a surprise." She says taking off her shirt. I look at her perfectly toned body balanced by her perfect tan. She slips another basketball t and fresh shorts. I go back to the clothes I was in for school, but we both left our hair up. We got to leave the locker room and just as we are almost there when Carmen comes running towards us.

"Spence can we talk?" she asks when she catches her breath.

"Yeah I guess. Ashley can you give us a minute?" I nod as the head down the hall and around the corner and as soon as the stop I can hear Carmen yell at Spencer."What the hell Spencer! You ignore me all day and then you blow me off at lunch and then you come to basketball with a new girl instead of me. You treat me at crap here as it is anyways! I practically made you the star you are. You're nothing but a bitch today."

By this time I've had enough I start jogging back to where they are. I get there just in time to see Carmen throw Spencer into the wall. Without hesitation I tackle Carmen to the ground. I hold her there so that Spencer can get up but I can't stop her from running her mouth and yelling.

"Now what's this Spencer. Is this how you treat all your girlfriends! Or oh wait are you cheating on me now? Is this your new girlfriend. Did you use me just for sex? Oh wait you never gave me any. You have got to be the worst girlfriend ever!"

I had enough. Spencer finally gets up and runs out of the building. While I have Carmen on the ground I punch her across the face with a left hook.

"Fucking bitch…" I say as I run out. "Spencer wait!" wow this girl is fast. No wonder she is the track star. When I finally catch up to her, she has locked herself in her car. It wasn't hard to find her since there is like five cars here and one is mine. I gently tap on the window and I Hear the car doors unlock.

I walk to the passage side door and get in. There are tears streaming down her face. We sit in silence for a good amount of time and this is the first time I've had to think about what Carmen had just done. The only thing I can think of is the word girlfriend. She said it more than two times and in my heart I know what that means. I just can't believe Carmen outed her supposed girlfriend like that. I hear Spencer shut her phone and starts the car. We drive silently until we reach a small coffee shop and she turns off the car.

"I'm sorry Ashley," Spencer finally says in a quiet voice.

"Why?" I ask."I never wanted you to see that or hear it like that."

"I won't say anything if it helps Spencer."

"I believe you Ashley, it just the others and Carmen." I lean over and wipe away the tear that has escaped from her eyes. Her skin is so soft. "I broke up with her to finally."

"That's good. Does she do stuff like that often?"

"Yeah… the bruises have finally gone away I am finally just done with it. For some reason I feel stronger when I'm with you, and I'm not trying to scare you or anything. I just like you as my friend."

Friend…. I finally have my first real friend


	6. Chapter 6

We run into the coffee shop just as it begins to rain. We seat ourselves in the back of the restaurant as a waiter brings us our menus and allows us some time to decide on what we would like. I look at Spencer. Her head is down and she hasn't looked at her menu.

"Hey Spencer?" I quietly ask her.

"Yeah?" her head doesn't move any as she answers me.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?"

"Um… as long as it's okay with you? I don't want to scare you or anything." She looks at me with pleading eyes begging for acceptance. I nod my head as she opens her mouth to speak.

"Hold on to that thought. Would you mind if I filmed this for our project? No one has to see if you don't want to but it is kinda something big in your life right?" I ask as nicely as possible for her sake. I don't want to see her cry again. She nods her head yes. I run out into the pouring rain and grab the camera out of the car. I shield it with my body so it doesn't get ruined. When I get back in a sit down and our waiter is ready to take our order. "I'll have an iced coffee please."

"I'll have the same," Spencer says handing him the menus as he walks away. "Even though I'm letting you film I still get to edit this if I want." I nod my head in agreement and I turn it on.

"I moved to California in the middle of last year. My mom was offered a better job and pay raise and with the economy the way it was we couldn't say no. I tried out for basketball one week before the first game. I didn't really think I would make it but I did and I was a big deal to everyone. Carmen was mad and upset someone had taken her glory. One day in the locker room we were by ourselves and she threw me into a locker. It wasn't rough as you might expect but it got me to sit down on a bench. She straddled me and stared in my eyes. I couldn't help but want to kiss her. There was something about her egotistical attitude that attracted me. She started to kiss me and I didn't refuse. We continued on until we heard other people coming in the hall way and we quickly stopped. We decided to keep us a secret even though she was already out. I didn't want to be known for being gay. I went to my brother who had started to notice something was going on with me and Carmen. I never had anyone guys over and I only hung out with her. When he finally asked him I begged him not to hate me and I gave him my journal to read. I didn't know how else to tell him other than blurting it out. I went to take a shower as he read. I silently cried for twenty minutes or so and when I out he ran up and hugged me and told me he would always love me no matter what would happen. But Carmen and I kept things quiet. We did this for some time and then she started pressuring me into telling my parents so we could be out of secrecy and I told her I couldn't do that. That was the first time she even hit me but it wasn't the last. Every time she asked and I said no about anything she would hit me and not stop till I was unconscious. I finally told her I would leave her if she didn't stop and she did, until today. I don't know what would have happened if you weren't there for me Ashley."

I turn the camera off and Spencer takes a drink of her coffee substance. We sit quietly drinking our coffee. I don't know where to go from here. I zone out again deep in my thoughts when all of a sudden there is hot coffee on my head. I jump out of my seat trying to get the hot off. Then a waiter pours ice cold water on me to I guess take away the heat but it returns freezes me to death. Spencer is laughing by the way I reacted. She is tipping back in her chair when it gives out under her weight on the two legs. Now it's my turn to bust up laughing. The waiter who accidently tripped and poured the hot coffee on me is looking in astonishment and the occurring events. When we settle down and Spencer is back to sitting right in her chair the waiter comes over to us.

"I'm really sorry about all of this. My name is Aiden and I'm new here, this is my first day. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?" he politely asks us.

"Well," I say thinking. "Maybe you could take me out for coffee since you work here sometime." He is a sorta cute boy. He smiles and it's a cute smile for him.

"Yeah sure. I'd love to." He looks into my eyes and Spencer coughs loudly cause apparently we are leaving her out.

"Oh… Hey Spencer. I didn't see you there."

"Hi Aiden." Spencer is upset I can tell. This might not be so good.

"I never got your name?" Aiden says turning back to me.

"I'm Ashley."

"Nice to meet you Ashley."

"Dennison! Back to work." Aiden's manager yells to him. Aiden waves bye with a smile and Spencer is just staring at the ground playing with her thumbs.

"Spencer are you alright?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. Do you want to go?"

"Sure." We get up and grab our things and we run out to her car. It's still pouring outside. Something tells me she isn't okay like she said she was. I just hope I can get her to open up with me again. When we get in the care we go back to school so I can get my car and we go back to my place since no one is even home. When we get there we go up to my room and lay on my bed.

"I really can't believe you and Kyla live in the house. It is so amazing and your room is like the size of my living room." This makes me smile. She is like a little kid in a candy store. "Can we watch a movie or something?" I get up and put in The 40 Year Old Virgin in. Such a great movie. I go back and lay on my bed with Spencer. For some reason I just want to lay with her near me. I look over to her and she looks at me.

"You okay?" She moves some hair out of my face. I sit up slightly and move closer to her and she wraps her arms around me. She gently rubs my back and I can hear her hear beat as I bury my face into her neck. It's beating rapidly and then I understand why she was upset earlier. I don't get why I have this urge to just lie close to her. I don't get why I just want to be around her. It is all so confusing and I don't know what I'm too. I just get lost in her sweet vanilla sent and close my eyes. I'm pretty sure I don't like girls but hey, I've been wrong before.

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**Hey guys. Sorry for the delay. A lot of bad things have currently happened and I haven't been able to update. Sorry about that. But I'm glad you are liking it so far and please review it. It makes me smile to see people's support. Thanks guys.  
.5**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys this is just a heads up. It gets bloody and graphical. Sorry about that but I kind had to. Thank you for the reviews though and Enjoy. -.5**

A few weeks pass by and everyone is talking about what went down in the locker room with Spencer and Carmen. Her friends have left her as a reject and besides her brothers no one is willing to be seen with her other than me but I don't have much of a reputation here anyways. We became to be really close over the weeks though. I found out we share a lot of the same things. We normally hang out every day after basketball but tonight is different. Tonight is the night Aiden is taking me out for dinner. He felt that coffee was too simple and changed our plans to dinner. After basketball I hug Spencer good bye as she tells me good luck, I know there is a part of her that wants this to go completely wrong but she hides it well.

"Don't forget you're helping me with my art project tomorrow after basketball." I say to her to try and make her smile just a little. I know she would never forget about our plans but still.

"I won't Ash. Call me later so I can know how it goes okay?"

"Alright I will. Bye Spence." I wave goodbye and get into my car. When I get home I jump in the shower and get the sweat off of my body. I let my mind wonder and I close my eyes. I can still smell Spencer's sweet vanilla sent, I can feel her arms wrapped around me holding me close. I sometimes wonder if what I'm doing to right is what I really want or just what my parents would want me to do. I really wish that they were still here with me.

"Ashley! Get out of the shower. You've been in there for forty-five minutes!" I guess I'm taking too long in here. Oh well.

"Use one of the other three bath rooms Kyla."

"Fine." I can hear her stomp down the stairs. I love making her mad. I get out of the shower and wrap a towel around my body.

I walk to my room and decide to dress in skinny jeans with holes up and down the legs with them rolled at the bottom. I pair of khaki flip flops and a green 'A Day To Remember' t with a purple hoodie. I dry my hair and straighten it. By time I am done Kyla is running back up to my room. I swear she sounds like a horse coming up those stairs.

"Ashley!"

"What?"

"Why is Aiden Dennison at our door asking for you?"

"Cause he is taking me to dinner. What is your problem?"

"Do you remember the day I ran off to go talk to boy?"

"Yeah what about it?"

"That boy was him! You practically just stole my crush."

"Chill out little sis. I don't really like him like that. He spilled coffee on me that same day and asked if he could make it up to me. I said coffee he wants dinner. End of story. Just calm down."

"Okay, but that better be all this is."

I walk down stairs and see Aiden waiting on me. We wave Kyla good bye and go to his car. He drives a Ford F-150. Got to love trucks.

"Thanks for agreeing to dinner instead of coffee."

"No problem." I say with a smile. We go to dinner and share some small talk and a couple laughs. Like I told Kyla, nothing too much to worry about. The whole time though I am thinking about Spencer and what she is doing right now. When we get done he takes my home and parks in the drive way turning off the car.

"Look I gotta tell you something though. The day we met was the greatest day of my life. I never thought I would talk to someone as gorgeous as you. You're smart, funny, and I really like spending time with you." He pauses and I look at him. He begins to lean in and I panic. When he notices I haven't moved forward he pulls back. "Is something wrong?"

"Yeah actually. I like you as a guy friend. It's my sister who has the major crush on you. I like someone else." He sits back in his seat not believing he just got denied.

"You sure you don't want to just try?"

"I'm sorry Aiden. I can't do it. It's unfair to you." I get out of his truck. "I'm sorry." I close the door and put my hands in my coat pocket as I walk back to my house. I go up to my room ignoring the fact my sister is all over me asking questions. I shut my door as I get into my room. I lie on my bed and grab a picture off my stand. I hold the picture on my lap as I look at it. Spencer and I out in the back yard playing on the trampoline. That was a really bad day for her too. People kept going up to her saying things like queer and dyke. I almost got expelled for punching a guy in the face for calling her those names. I couldn't stand seeing people hurt her like that. Her mom also found out about her because the principle called and told her what had been going on and that he was concerned about her. Thankfully her parents were understanding of the situation and told Spencer they loved her no matter what. She has the best family a kid could ask for. Unlike my broken up dead family.

The only people who really even care what happens to me is Kyla and Spencer. I don't know what things would be like without them. I roll up my left sleeve and gently rub the scars in my wrist. That day will always haunt me and no matter what I do it will always be there. My parents got into a really bad fight and were settling it by leaving each other. Not like they ever got married or anything, they just lived together because of me, or at least that was what I thought.

"You are the worst woman in this damn world. You and your bastered child. I Hope you both die and burn in a blazing hell." My dad was so drunk that night and so was my mom.

"What fucking child? That girl we have? I'll be damned if that demon was mine. It's your fault you don't like condoms or any other shit." They had no idea I was awake sitting at the top of the stairs listening to them. I was only eight at the time. I ran into my room crying my eyes out. It felt as if everything was my dad finally left my mom but five years later came back to see me play in the freshmen state championship game. Little did I know that was nothing but a lie. He had brought a forty-two caliber and shot my mom in the left temple and then came after me. Thankfully I managed to get away and ran all the way to my school. He had followed me in his car and right in the middle of the auditorium he grabbed me and pushed me onto the ground. He sat on top of my stomach and pulled my hand up to the gun as he placed it towards his temple. He placed my finger on the trigger place his finger on mine and pulled the trigger. His dead bloody body fell on top of me and blood was gushing out of everywhere. I panicked and passed out.

I woke up in the locker room with just the coach. She told me the game was canceled and that I could stay with her. I just cried for days and days on end. That was when I learned I had a step sister and moved with her and when her mom passed away a few months ago we moved to California to get away from it all and the government comes to check in on us every now and then to make sure there is no alcohol and that we are begin to run down my face as I lie down on my bed. I call up Spencer even though it is late. I know she always answers her phone when I call.

"Hey Ash. How'd it go."

"Spence can you come stay the night with me? Please?" I ask trying to hold back the tears.

"Of course. I'll be there soon."


	8. Chapter 8

I sat on my bed crying for what felt like days even though it was just mere minutes. I had everything bottled up inside for so long and I never told Kyla the whole story either. She knows the basics but not the details. I just don't know how to tell her. They were my parents for the most part, just the same dad.

I heard a knock on the door and I knew it was Spencer, but Kyla managed to beat me to the door. I ran half way up the stairs to try and get back to my room and wipe away the smudged eye liner that was running down my face. I went into the bathroom connected to my room. I started to wash my face with water when a familiar voice was speaking to me.

"Ash, you okay? You sounded like you were going to cry on the phone." Spencer asks walking up behind me and gently rubbing my arms. My hands held in my face looking down, and Spencer slowly turns me around and lifts up my head to see me. "You can tell me anything." I drop my hands to my side and fall into her embrace crying once again. She gently rubs my back trying to sooth me and its working. She gets me calm enough to walk over to my bed and talk with her. "What's wrong Ash?"

I know it's time I told someone and stopped keeping this to myself. I know it isn't healthy for me but I worry about how she will react and take it. Will she be like the kids at my old school who weren't there and call me a murder? Will she stop being my friend? All of these thoughts run through my head and I hesitate as I open my mouth. Slowly the words of my past flow out of my mouth like a steady waterfall. I pause every now and again to let each word and every thought sink in. I chose my words carefully so she doesn't freak out and just leave. I make sure to include every detail my mind will allow me to remember. It isn't easy but soon my story is told and now I'm not the only one in the city to know what happened. "And that is why I was crying on the first day of basketball. I get afraid it will happen again or someone else will go through what I went through. I doubt it will happen but it scares me every time I'm on the court." Spencer leans over and pulls me into a hug.

"Ash, nothing will ever happen like that again. It was a rare and horrible occurrence. I know it has to be really tough on you though. If you want me to I can try to help you think less about it on the court by just playing a game or something with you if you want. I want to help you if you'll let me."

"That'd be nice," I simply say.

"Thank you for letting me in tonight," Spencer says to me and I feel like I can trust her with anything. I just hope she feels the same towards me. "Well it's like 1:30. Do you want to go to sleep and I can leave or do you want to talk about how things went to night with Aiden or do you just want to hang out or something?" Spencer throws out there.

"Well you aren't leaving 'cause of curfew and I don't want you into trouble with the po po, and I promised to tell you about dinner with Aiden." Spencer gets a smile on her face.

"Okay, so tell me about tonight."

"Well he took me out to La Rouge and we just a casual conversation, really light, and then he took me home and tried to kiss me." I stop at this point to see how she will react to it. I just need to know something.

"He tried to kiss you? Did you let him?" Spencer acts as if it would have never bothered her in a million years. Questions can now be considered answered. Everything I thought I was feeling for her was nothing. Maybe I should give Aiden a second chance and just tell him things went to fast for the night and I wasn't ready or that I want to take things really slow. Maybe he'll just try to get with Kyla now that he knows she likes him and just forget about me. Yeah, we'll go with the last one.

"No, I didn't. I don't want to go to fast and I'm not sure my sister would like it very much."

"Kyla likes Aiden?"

"Yeah. You haven't noticed her drooling all over him have you?"

"No," she said laughing, "Not since I got kicked out of the popular group." Our laughter quickly came to a halt.

"It's late. We should go to sleep. You can sleep on my bed and I'll sleep on the floor." This being the first time she stayed the night it's only appropriate for me to give her my bed. Besides I realized to night she doesn't like me.

I can tell Aiden that if my sister ever gives up on him. He is a really sweet boy, but Spencer is a really sweet girl. I'm just so lost and confused. Gah. I just need to let my mind stop thinking about this stuff and not care about friendships or relationships like that. I just need to let things play out. By this time a pillow is square in my face.

"Ouch! Hey." I say it a high pitch kid voice. I put on my puppy face like I'm going to cry. Spencer just hit me in the face with a stupid pillow and is dying of laughter on my bed. I'm not calling an ambulance if she passes out. "What was that for?" I ask still doing my 'about to cry' look.

"You zoned out really badly and I was talking and you ignored me so I figured I would hit you with a pillow. So I did. Has to be better than a locker door." I laugh at this and remember the first day we met. A smile pops on my face.

"So what was it that you said?"

"I said we can both sleep in the bed. It's big enough for both of us. That is if you want to."

"Sure," I say and I get off the ground and pull the covers back so we can get in. As Spencer climbs into the bed I switch the lights off and walk back to my side of the bed. I get under the cover and I feel Spence shift to face me.

"Can I ask you something?" Spencer asks in a hushed voice.

"You just did."I answer back laughing. She starts to laugh as well.

"Come on Ash I'm being serious."

My laughing dies down rather fast. "Okay. What is it?"

"Would it be weird if I wanted to be in your arms while we slept like the last time we were just lying in a bed?" Maybe I was wrong. I'm not a genius or anything but maybe I'm not the only one who is feeling something. "

No. Do you want me to hold you?" I ask back to her.

"Would you?" I scoot to the middle of the bed where she is and I wrap my arms around her as she buries her face in my shoulder. It feels good to have her in my arms.

**Wow. Two months of not updating. I'm really sorry. Life went on over drive and I haven't be able to update. Please don't hate me lol. Reviews maybe? I don';t like asking but they really help out. Thank guys. :)**

**-.5**


	9. Chapter 9

**I felt bad about not posting for so long so here is the next chapter. I enjoyed writing this one quiet welll and I hope you enjoy reading it. Just don't kill. Read and you'll understand what I mean ;) lol**

**-.5**

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I wake up only a few hours later to Spencer drooling on my arm. She looks so peaceful though. Part of me wants to just kiss the girl lying in my arms, but I know I can't. Not before I get things figured out and I'm pretty sure I told myself to stop thinking about this stuff but I can't help it. I'm so comfortable with her in my arms. I could stay like this forever. Spencer rustles around a bit and lifts her head.

"You okay?" she asks in a raspy voice that still sounds amazing.

"Yeah I'm okay. I'm just thinking about stuff." I reply in a quite tone.

"Like what type of stuff?" She won't let this go, I know it. I can't tell her though. I can't just blurt out 'oh I was thinking about kissing you while you slept and that I'm confused about who I am.' That would not work out well.

"Ash?"

"Don't worry about it Spence. It's alright."

"I don't believe that. I know you a little better than you think. Is it something about me? Kyla? You? Aiden? Your parents? Any of these."

"Two of them, yeah."

" Kyla and you?"

"No."

"Kyla and Aiden?" I can tell she knows but is purposely avoiding it. "Your parents and you?"

"Nope."

"You and Aiden"

"No."

"Me and Kyla?"

"No."

"Aiden and your parents?" I can't help but laugh at the one. She has a smile on her face as well, but disappears just a quick as it appeared. "What about you and me?" I remain quite. I know she can't see me and I'm happy about that 'cause I'm sure my face is beat red. "I'll take you silence as a yes. What about us Ash?" I just pretend to be asleep. I can't do this right now. Not like this. "Okay ignore me." She untangles us and goes back to her own side. I lack of her presence makes me shoot up in my bed like waking up from a nightmare.

"Who said you could leave me?"

"I did." She seems kinda upset I didn't answer question.

"Well I forbid you from leaving me without my permission" I say playfully. I jump on top of her but she pulls the covers over her head. "I forbid that too. Looks like you leave me no other option but to tickle you out." Immediately the covers shoot off of her face.

"You wouldn't dare."

"Try me." She pulls the covers back over her head and that's my green light. I start to tickle her everywhere. This girl is seriously ticklish. I like it though. She starts laughing telling me to stop but I keep going joining in her laughter.

"Seriously Ashley, my abs hurt from laughing."

"Good," I say,"Keep you in shape."

"Did you just call me fat?" By now Spencer is having a hard time getting out a single word.

"Yes I am. What are you going to do about it?" Now Spencer is it pissed mood. She grabs my waste and flips us over. She holds my hands above my head as she straddles me. My heart is racing a million miles an hour. She lowers her face inches from mine.

"I'm going to make you regret calling me fat." She says with a smirk on her face. I'm worried now. Spencer isn't a weak person and I'm sure she could handle herself against a boy twice her size. "Tell me what you were thinking about and I'll let you go." About five minutes pass and as soon as I'm about to tell her Kyla slams the door open and flips the light on.

"What the hell is going…..? Ah oh shit. I'm sorry!" Kyla slammed the door closed and we listened to her bolt down the stairs. Spencer and I both look back at each other. She let's go of my hands and lays down next to me.

"What's wrong?" I ask her confused to why she stopped our game.

"Kyla just walked in on us."

"So what?" "She thinks we were… we were doing things. Sexual things."

"That's not what I got out of it." That was a straight up lie. I knew my sister's thoughts before she had them. I know I can explain things to her though.

"What do you think she was thinking then Ashley? She just saw me on top of you holding you down. That could be something considered sexual. I don't want you sister to think were sleeping together or something."

"Do you not want to sleep with me? I offered to sleep on the floor." I know that's not what she meant but it was all I could think of to lighten the mood up.

"You know that's not what I meant."

"Why does it bother you that she thinks that we're sleeping together? We're not so who cares what people think?"

"It's more complicated for me than you probably realize."

"Then explain it to me."

"I can't. Just like you can't tell me what you were thinking about."

"Spencer. I can't tell you because I'm scared. There are unknown factors to my thoughts. I just want to figure things about."

"To figure out if I'm what you want?"

"What do you mean?" Smooth. Really smooth Ashley. Play the dumb blonde part and let her explain everything you already know to be true. It's obvious she likes you so just tell her already. Oh wow, I'm talking to myself.

"Ash, I don't want to scare you off but… I like you. Like I like like you. I want to be with you and every time I'm with you I want to kiss you and it so hard not to. If Kyla hadn't walked in I probably would have just …"

I couldn't take it anymore. My heart was gone by the first line out of her mouth. I make her lay down on the bed. By this time my brain has lost all control and I'm on auto pilot. I slowly straddle her and her arms slowly rise to my hips to gently hold me. We both know where this is heading but not too far. I slowly lower my body on to hers. Her shirt is slightly lifted up from the bed and I press my stomach on hers and I instantly feel her warmth. I place my elbows on the bed and slightly brush so hair out of her eyes. We slowly lean in for a much wanted and desired kiss. With mere inches to go the door opens up and Kyla pokes her head in again and turns the light off.

"Sorry about last time. Night you guys." She whispers to where we could barely hear her and softly shuts the door.

"I told you she wouldn't care." I can see Spencer's outline from the moonlight shining on her. I can tell she is smiling.

I lean forward once more and suddenly fall of my bed. I stand up and see Spencer lying how we fell asleep.

"It was all just a dream." I defeated crawl back into bed and silently cry myself to sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

I wake up the next morning to find Spencer is already up and out of bed.

"Spence?" I throw the sheets off of me and change out of my pajamas. I walk out of my room and go down stairs to see if she is watching tv or something. Thank goodness it's Saturday though. I really don't feel like dealing with school right now.

As I reach the last step I gear laughter coming from the kitchen. I walk around the corner only to get pelted with a pancake in my face. Spencer and Kyla are both staring at me like I ruined their fun or something.

"What? Is something on my face?" I asked quite serious only to end up with them both cracking up. I don't think I said anything funny unless something is on my face. Oh, God. What is on my face? I run to the microwave freaking out and look at the glass door. There is whip cream all over my face and hair. I look like a giant marsh mellow. I look over to Spencer and Kyla, who are both laughing so hard they are crying and on the floor. "I hate you guys." I walk out of the kitchen to go get cleaned up. I think they planned that to be honest. My sister would defiantly do something like that. As I reach the door I start to plan my revenge and the perfect plan comes to me.

I rush getting the whip cream out of my hair and quickly but silently run down stairs and out the side entrance. I run down past the pool into our small shed. I grab what I was looking for and go back into the house and back up to the bathroom. About five minutes later my plot has be set into motion. I walk down the steps quietly. Spencer and Kyla are eating pancakes in the kitchen with their backs turned away from me. This is just way to perfect. I sprawl out on the ground and army crawl about three feet away from them. I slowly stand up and with two fully loaded mega blaster squirt guns being to fire both simultaneously at both of them. They both freak out in their chairs and quick try to run away from the freezing water. Kyla, super woman, hopped over the counter in a fluid jump to the other side ducking while Spencer just ran in circles not knowing where to go. I focus both the squirt guns on her then run behind the counter to get my sister with what little water is left. When I'm out of water both my little sister and Spencer are soaking wet.

"Hey look guys! I made you both wet at once." I blurt out and this makes both them laugh.

"Call a truce for today Ashley?" Kyla asks placing out her hand. I have won the battle for today.

"Truce." I place my hand in her hand and shake.

"Come on Spence. Let's get you cleaned up." We start to walk up the stairs but not before Kyla stomps off.

"Sure help her, not your sister." Spencer and I both just laugh as we enter my room. I go to my closet and grab a pair of shorts and a tank for Spencer to change into.

"I'll just go wait outside." Spencer nods as I exit the room despite wanting to stay in there. I wouldn't have a problem with it and I know she would but I can't let her know, not just yet.

"You can come back in." I hear Spencer say as I open my door.

"You still going to help me with my art project?"

"Yup, that's why I'm here."

"Does your mom even care you snuck out?"

"I left a note and I called about ten minutes before you woke up."

"Oh. Gotcha."

"So where is this project of yours?" I go to bed and reach underneath it and grab the canvas and set it up while grabbing the supplies off the top of it. "You haven't even started?"

"No. I can't think of anything to paint. I'm better at writing."

"So why not write something then paint it?"

"Never really thought of that."

"Well words are describing a picture you get to imagine in your head and so other can see what you are seeing."

"You are just as smart as they say you are." Spencer blushes a little.

"I guess. So what have you written that you could paint?"

"Well I have music written but I'm not sure it's any good. I haven't written in a couple months."

"It's alright. Can I see some of it?"

"Uh. It's kinda personal ya know. I'm not ready for it to been see by anyone but me."

"Oh. Well that's okay." Spencer said. She looks kinda sad though.

"Maybe I'll play something for you someday."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Okay." She just got the goofiest smile I have ever seen but somehow it suits her quiet well. She looks so happy and kinda cute.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" I ask and she looks like that was an out of the blue question.

"Yeah, sure. Where to?"

"Well that part is a surprise. I may not have lived her for more than a month of so but I know some really cools places."

"Okay cool." We leave the house and get into the car and turn the music on and there is a news report on.

"There has been a horrible car accident on interstate 70."

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**Thanks to those who are still with me on this. MY computer was down all night last night so I only got to write a few chapters. But hope you re still enjoying this. Critique?**

**-.5**


	11. Chapter 11

"There has been a horrible car accident on interstate 70. Three people in a black Mazda were run over by a semi truck. The driver of the semi was pinned at alcohol levels twice the amount of the legal limit and had fallen asleep at the wheel. The bodies in the car are badly messed up to but cops recovered their license. The respected and highly looked up Mr. and Mrs. Carlin and one of their children, Clay, were in the car and have been pronounced dead at the scene."

I turn the radio off and look at Spencer. Tears are on the brink of falling. I reach over to her and pull her into a hug. She begins to cry hard which only makes me hold her closer. We stayed like this for a good while and I started to just whisper to her to try to get her to calm down. It seemed to be working 'cause she finally started to settle down a bit.

"Spence, you alright?"

She leans back a little to look at me. Tears are still streaming down her face slowly. II lift my hand up and wipe the fallin tears away.

"Why does it have to be my parents Ash? Why?"

"I'm not sure Spence… I'm not sure."

"Everything is ruined Ash. They protected me from Glen who hates me being gay, and everyone else. They loved me no matter what. They kept me stable and pushed me to be great. Now they are gone and I'm subject to everyone's hatred. They were the only people in this world who loved me for me. What I'm I going to do Ash?"

I just look into her eyes.

"You're going to be strong Spence. You're going to stay with me and Kyla. Your parents brought up this amazing girl who one day will have someone to love and be loved. Not everyone is going to hate you, 'cause I know I don't know what I would do without you."

Spencer just looked at me in shock.

"You mean that?"

"Yeah, Spence. You mean a lot to me." More than even I realize, but I'm just going to keep that to myself. I look over to her and she has a smile on her face. The only one I'm probably gonna get to see for a little while.

"Can I really stay with you and Kyla though?"

"Oh yeah totally as long as Glen doesn't fight it."

"He can do that?"

"Yeah. He is the oldest in your family and he can control what you do now."

"Wow" She leaned back into her set. "This is so messed up."

"I'm really sorry Spence." I take her hand into mine and give it a light squeeze but don't let go. I want her to know I'm here for her.

"Can we go to the hospital? They are probably expecting me and Glen there."

"Sure." I go to let go over her hand but she won't let me.

"Please don't let go of me" she whispers on the brink of crying once more. I nod my head and start the car up once again and head off o the hospital.

We get out of the car and I continue to let Spencer hold my hand. When we arrive to the doors, we are automatically greeted at the door.

"Spencer we were hoping you heard on the new and would come. Your brother is already here in the lobby waiting on you."

"Thank you Dr. Sharon." We walk into the lobby to find Glen anxiously pacing around the room. I guess he caught saw us 'cause he stopped pacing and walked right up to us.

"What the hell Spencer?"

"What?"

"Why weren't you here sooner? Quite being a dyke and holding her hand. Fucking lesbians." He grabs our wrist to separate us. "You can leave now. I can take care of my sister." Spencer was not kidding when she called him an ass hole.

"Uh no. I'm not leaving her with you."

Glen's eyes got really big. I must have pissed him off. I go back over to Spencer and grab her hand once again. Glen starts to walk over but thankfully his name was called.

"Glen we need you to come with us. Spencer will come back for you in a few minutes." Spencer nods her head towards the doctor.

"You alright? He's a jerk."

"I know. I really don't want to go home with him."

"You don't have to. I'll take care of you."

We sit in two chairs next to each other and she rests her head on my shoulder. I could really get used to this. Not the whole death thing but just having Spencer next to me and needing me. I close my eyes to just relax and not long after Spencer is being called. She stands up to Dr. Sharon.

"Spencer, you ready?"

"Can Ashley come with me? I don't know if I could go alone."

"Sure that's fine. You two make such a cute couple." Dr. Sharon says.

"We're not together. We're just friends and she's straight." Spencer's words slide off. I stand up behind Spencer and we follow Dr. Sharon to the back.

"Spencer I know this is going to be hard but we need you to make a confirmation of your family. Can you do that for me?"

"Don't leave me Ash"

"Of course not."

We walk into the room with three bodies covered in a white sheet. Dr. Sharon removes the white sheet to reveal the first person. I can't help but look. Spencer burst into tears and Runs right into my arms. I rub my hand up and down her back to try and get her to calm down. I pretty sure this is not going to get any better. I just feel so horrible for her. They never made me do this part.

"Spencer we need a conformation. Do you know who this is?"

Dr. Sharon is trying to be patient but she looks like she can't wait too long. Without turning back around, Spencer mumbles into my shoulder.

"It's Clay." Spencer says tears still streamong down her baby blue eyes.

"Okay, two more."

"Spence just a little bit longer and we can leave okay?" She shakes her head in my shoulder.

I lift her up and move her two the second bed as Dr. Sharon removes the white sheet to reveal someone's face. Spencer slowly looks around to see who it is.

"It's my dad."

Dr. Sharon nods and covers Mr. Carlin back up like she did to Clay. We walk over to the third bed.

"Please don't take off the sheet. I'm know it's my mom… please I don't want to see."

"Spencer we need a conformation."

"I've seen Mrs. Carlin a few times. I've never met her but could I confirm it so Spence doesn't have to?"

"Sure that's fine as long as Spencer lets you."

"Spence, would that be easier for you?"

"You'd do that for me?"

"I know how much you love her. I want you last image for her to be of her alive, not lying on this metal bed."

Spencer smiles a little bit and nods her head. Dr. Sharon reveals the face and I look.

"This it's Mrs. Carlin." I hear Spencer just lose it. She has always been strong. Stronger than anyone I know.

"That's all we needed."

We walk out to the lobby and some of the items recovered were handed to Glen and Spencer.

"Let's go Spencer." Glen says grabbing Spencer's wrist.

"Glen stop it!" She pulls back her hand.

"I don't want to go anywhere with you. You're back on those meds again. You different than the nice brother I used to have. I want nothing to do with the new you."

"You know what is different about me? It's not any medication you think I have. It's losing my friends and my reputation because my little sister is gay. You ruined my life. As far as I know you could have been in that car instead of Clay and I wouldn't give a shit. I'd tell them I have no idea who you were and that I am happy you were dead."

I run and jump and tackle Glen and start to beat him up. He must be on drugs if I can easily take him down. In less than thirty seconds two guards are pulling me off of a very bloody Glen.

"You ass hole! How dare you say those things to your sister? She deserves so much better than that from a older sibling. And her being gay shouldn't matter. You should love her no matter who she chooses to love."

The two guards let me go after I'm at least five feet away from him and there is a doctor helping him up. I grab Spencer and we leave to my car .We get in and just sit there. My adrenaline is rushing and I need to settle down. After about five minutes Spencer breaks the silence.

"Thank you Ashley."

"For what? All I did was beat your brother up."

"I know but what you said to him. It made me feel like you care more about me than he does."

"Spence, I do care about you. I want to be here for you no matter what and I don't want anyone to hurt you." She smiles at me. And my phone goes off. Kyla is calling.

"Hey Kyla what's up?"

"Have you seen the news yet?"

"Yes Ky, everything is okay and Spence will be staying with us for a while. We're about to leave the hospital but I'm going to take her to a special place if you don't mind."

"Yeah that's fine. Just be safe okay."

"I will Ky."

"Okay see you later."

"Okay hey Ky."

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too Ash." I hang up the phone and start the car.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey guys here the newest addition. Sorry the last chapters have been kinda slow and boring. I wasn't sure what to do with them but needed to set somethings up for later on. Hopefully this one is better but let me know what you think ;) enjoy and critiquing is much needed please**

* * *

I drive us back to the house real quick and I let Spencer wait in the car since I won't be gone long. I run into the house and straight up to my room. I go to my dresser throwing clothes out of my drawers left and right until I find what I'm looking for.

"They they are. Little bugers."

I throw some items into a bag. Go get changed and run back to the car. I pop the trunk open and throw the bag in. I really hope she enjoys this. I go to get in the car and I look in the front of the car. Spencer is sleeping like a baby. She looks so peaceful with her chest slowly rising and falling. I open my door quietly and get it. She looks so beautiful right now. I take out my phone and snap a quick picture. You never know.

I start the car and head out. When we arrive at the destination, Spencer is still asleep. I get out the car and lock it while popping the trunk. I grab out the bag I grabbed and looked for a place to set up shop.

"I know the perfect spot." I say. Great I'm talking to myself. Again.

I make my way over to my spot while looking back to make sure Spencer hadn't awakened, I want to surprise her. It was just my luck she had fallen asleep. I lay the things out from my bag and run up to the car and slowly get in like nothing has happened. Not but a minute or two later Spencer wakes up.

"Hey beautiful." I smile at her.

"Hey." She smiles back at me. That smile though can be dangerous. "Where we at Ash?"

"Why not take a look for yourself." She leans up and looks out the window. "The beach?"

"Yup. Come on. I already set up a place for us and in the back seat is an extra bathing suit. So you can change and I'll wait for you here."

I get out of the car and Spencer jumps into the back seat and changes quickly. Too quick for me to sneak a peek.

"I'm ready."

"Then let's go my highness." She links her arm around my arm I lead her to where I laid everything down.

"Under the pier?"

"You don't like this spot?"

"No, I do. It's just I never thought about it before."

"It's one of my favorite places to think and listen to the waves."

We sit down on the blanket and just talk about light topics for awhile. We eventually drift to sleep or at least I thought Spencer had until I wake up to her throwing a bucket of cold water all over.

"Spencer!" She starts laughing. "You are so dead." Her face just drops like she's been caught with drugs or something.

"Uh oh."

"Uh oh is right. You better run Carlin."

I chase after her around the beach. People all stare at us like we are insane or something. Spencer decided to run into the ocean thinking I will stop. I bolt in after her and when the water is about knee high I jump and tackle her.

"So much for being a track star huh."

"I let you catch me."

"Sure ya did Spence." We both start laughing. "You have something in your hair."

"Ewwwy. Get it off! Get it off Ashley!"

"Calm down you big baby." I walk over to Spencer and I grab the stringy stuff out of her hair and caress my hand against her cheek. "Spence I…" We both lean in.

Is this finally going to happen? I've been dreaming about this moment for days. Oh wow. I'm getting happy. Shit Ashley. Quit talking to yourself and kiss the girl already. I lean in and she does the same. Our lips are centimeters apart and I can taste her breath.

_Splash!_

Spencer is now feet away from me. "What the hell just happened?"

"I'll tell you what just happened bitch." Ugh. A voice that I so wish would disappear. "You and I are meeting up on the other side of the pier in ten minutes. Oh, and you better be there. Hey, Spencer. I'm sorry about your family."

Now I'm just straight up pissed. I already beat Carmen up once and now she has to ruin my moment with Spencer. What is this girls freaking problem? You should listen to yourself when you say you should quit talking and kiss the girl. Great, talking is now arguing. Someone put me on medication. I could be going crazy.

I storm out of the water and walk back to our spot. I lay down on my side trying to ignore the fact Spencer would want to talk about what just about happened. I feel her sit down on the blanket next to me. She places her hand on my side and gently rubs her thumb on my bare skin.

"Ash. You okay?"

"I'm fine Spence. I'm just upset with Carmen and myself."

I turn around and sit up to face her. Her hand falls onto my thigh.

"I wonder what the hell she wants with me and why she would do that to you. I just don't get it Spence."

"I don't get it either but if she tries to start something please just let it go. I don't need you in the hospital today to."

"I won't Spence, but if she swings and lands one I'm knocking her out. I'm not letting her get to you."

"Okay. That's fair enough." Spencer pulls me in for a hug and I don't want to let go. I know I can fight but I don't know how well this is going to end.

"Come on bitch, let's go." Carmen says walking behind Spencer and me never making eye contact.

"Stay here okay?" Spencer nods as I get up and walk behind Carmen. This girl is going down if she says anything about my girl.

We walk about 30 yards away from where Spencer and I were laying, still in plain sight for Spencer though. She stops and turns to look at me. Her face softens up as she looks at me.

"What is it that you want Carmen? You've already fucked up my day."

"Look I'm sorry but I needed to get you away from Spencer."

"Really why is that? We have done nothing wrong."

"'Cause of this."

Before I can process anything Carmen grab my face and roughly places her lips on mine. My eyes shoot wide open. This bitch is crazy. I grab her arms and try to shove her off but it only seems to make her stronger. I really don't want to touch her. She might have a disease or something. By time I can break away I can feel eyes burning a hole straight threw me. Spencer. Crap she probably saw that.

"What the hell Ashley?"

"Spencer just let me explain." I turn around to face her. Tears are streaming down her face for the fifth time today. So much for trying to make her happy. I'm just a failure. Shit I should probably listen.

"Explain what? The fact you can make out with my ex but you can't even get yourself together long enough to kiss me or even tell me how you feel?"

"Spence it isn't like that."

"No." Spencer begins to back away shaking her hands in front of her. I try to take a step forward but she just walks back faster. "You no longer have the right to call me that. Ever. And whatever there could have been between us is done. Have fun being Carmen's new bitch."

"Spencer wait."

"I'm done waiting." She turns around and runs off.

"Now it can just be me and you. No more worries."

"No more worries? Oh you're so wrong. Whatever _that_ was is not going to happen. You just fucked up my life, so now I'm going to fuck us yours. I'm not taking any type of shit from you."

"Ashley come on. You really want an emotional girl like that. I thought you were into girls like you. Strong and confident." Carmen begins to stroke my arm.

"If I dated a girl like myself I'd want to die. That's why what you ruined is twice as bad. I don't date girls. Spencer is special. You, you are nothing to me. Get you nasty hands off of me and get the hell away from me and Spencer."

I run back to Spencer and mine spot. I quickly round up the gear and run to the car. I don't see Spencer anywhere. This is so not good. I throw the stuff in the back seat and get in the car. I drive out of the parking lot.

I know she wouldn't go to her house because Glen is there. I really hope she is trying to walk to my house. I turn left and begin scanning the scene looking for my blonde beauty. About a mile from the beach parking look I spot her walking on the side of the road. I pull over and get out.

"Spencer wait." I run up to her but she only walks faster. "Spencer please stop." I place my hand on her shoulder and turn her around to face me. Her eyes are red and puffy, mascara running down her face along with countless tears.

"Spencer…"

"I don't want to hear it Ashley."

"Then don't but please don't walk home. It's five more miles please. Just get in the car… I won't bother you or anything."

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**This was going to be a clift hanger but I decided against it lol. Lucky you.** **Spashley next chapter? Stay tuned and find out. -.5**


	13. Chapter 13

Two weeks pass by of just living through the motions. Each day was a repeat. Just waking up, go to school, go to basketball, go home, eat, do homework that I'm actually starting to do, and go to sleep. Even though Spencer lives with me and we practically spend every waking moment together, she won't speak to me. I know what she saw looked bad but could it really affect her this much? I don't know what she is thinking and it feels like I don't even know her any more.

Of course Carmen isn't making this any easier. She is constantly trying to get me to hang out after practice and she calls me constantly. I stupidly let her use my phone to call her mom, but she just stole my number. I have her under the name 'ignore' so I know not to answer and it does give Spencer any indication I'm talking to her.

For some reason though, today just feels different. I mean our first game is coming up tomorrow and today's practice will decide who starts. I really don't even care about it but this is Spencer's dream and she is going to for sure start. But the real problem is when it comes to point. Carmen and I don't know who first string is and who is second. Either way she is going to be pissed and not want either of us to be point.

Might as well through Madison in as point. She is the third option. She's a junior but she only plays because her brother wants her to. Her parents are always M.I.A. so he takes care of her and they seem really close.

I lay on my bed waiting for my alarm clock to go off telling me to get my lazy butt off this bed. It's only six thirty and I don't need up 'til eight. Every day had been like this though. I can't sleep; I just lay here and think. I look over to my desk and see a folder I haven't touched in ages. I sit up on the edge of my bed and cross my feet. I stand up and walk over to my closet and grab out my old acoustic guitar and remove the pick from the strings. I grab the folder off my desk and sit back on my bed cross legged. I strum the guitar and tune it back to normal. I take a deep breath and sigh.

As open up the folder, I place my fingers gently on the strings. I slowly trace my fingers up and down the strings while placing my fingers are chords making sure I remember them. I shift through the folder and find a sheet of music without words. For some reason this particular melody wouldn't leave my head for days. I remember it though as I look over the chords. The words I tried to place under them just never seemed to fit no matter how much I played around with them. I slow start to strum the chords as I see them. Slowly I begin to sing words as the flow through my head like a river.

_You, you got me  
Thinking it'll be alright.  
You, you told me,  
"Come and take a look inside."  
You believed me,  
In every single lie.  
But I, I failed you this time._

_And it feels like tonight.  
I can't believe I'm broken inside.  
Can't you see that there's nothing that I wanna do,  
But try to make it up to you?  
And it feels like tonight,  
Tonight.  
_

I close my eyes and drift in to the music as I let my fingers glide over the strings.

_  
I was waiting  
For the day you'd come around.  
I was chasing,  
And nothing was all I found.  
From the moment you came into my life,  
You showed me what's right. _And it feels like tonight.

And it feels like tonight.  
I can't believe I'm broken inside.  
Can't you see that there's nothing that I wanna do,  
But try to make it up to you?  
And it feels like tonight.

I never felt like this before.  
Just when I leave, I'm back for more.  
Nothing else here seems to matter.  
In these ever-changing days,  
You're the one thing that remains.  
I could stay like this forever.

_  
I can't believe I'm broken inside.  
Can't you see that there's nothing that I wanna do,  
But try to make it up to you?  
And it feels like tonight.  
Tonight.  
Tonight.  
'Cause there's nothing that I wanna do,  
But try to make it up to you.  
And it feels like tonight.  
Tonight._

As I stop strum I open my eyes and place my pick down next to me. I think I just found my words to place to this song. I look up from my guitar to find a pencil and I see Spencer standing in my doorway. Oh no. Please tell me she just got there.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Second verse. Ashley… Do you mean what you sung?" That's not a just-to-the-point type question.

"Yeah, I guess. The melody went years without words. I just kinda sung what I felt… Ya know. Winged it."

"Well it sounded amazing."

She walks over and sits on the bed with me. This is the most we've spoke in two weeks.

"Ashley, I'm really sorry about what happened. I over reacted and I just felt like everything was lost and I didn't want to know what really happened. I just wanted to say sorry."

"Spence..er, it's okay. I get it, but it was nothing like you think or thought it was."

"I believe you Ash, but can you tell me what really happened?"

She studies my eyes as I get lost in hers.

"Went to talk or whatever and I asked her what her problem was and she kissed me. It's not like I wanted her to or asked her to. She just grabbed me and did it. That was it Spence."

"Okay."

She places her hand on my knee. And now there is just silence between us. I really have no idea what to say or do. I'm really bad at the whole touchy-feely thing. It's always been Kyla's field of expertise. Speaking of which she is now standing in my door way. Is my room just like a free for all standing area or something?

"Kyla what are you doing?"

"I'm watching and waiting for you two love birds make up."

"Love birds? Seriously not like that."

"Okay you can't see how you are together. You both obviously want each other but are letting some stupid girl ruin it. God just kiss and make up already, the whole world has been waiting for you two to get it over and done with."

She throws her hands up in the air. Kyla, Kyla, always been one for being over dramatic and doesn't know how to mind her own damn business.

"Well if you leave maybe we will."

Spencer looks at me like I'm crazy.

"Oh really now? I guess I'll be leaving."

"Close the door while you're at it." Kyla closes the door and leaves.

"Hmm now here's the question. Do you mean that or did you just want her to leave?"

I sit there and act like I'm thinking about it. The answer should be obvious but she's fun to mess with 'cause she is so gullible.

"Well let's see. I wanted her to leave so she did so I guess I want option two please."

She laughs and blushes at the same time. I lay my guitar down behind me and look and the blonde beauty before my eyes. I lean in as I start to close the gap between us once again. Third time is a charm right?

"Hey Ash don't use wat… Oh crap my bad." Spencer and I quickly separate "Damn you two move fast."

"Okay seriously this is the third time now. Go Kyla. I'll flush a toilet if I feel like it. Now go."

"You suck." Kyla closes the door and runs off to do whatever it is she does.

"It seems like every time we get close someone cuts us off." Spencer looks at me with her bottom lip stuck out.

"Well." I get up and walk over to my door. "Let's fix that then." I turn the lock and walk back over to my bed and sit down next to Spencer. "Is that better?"

"Why yes it is."

We smile at each other and lean in once morn and this time out lips finally meet in the middle. It doesn't last long but it still finally happened and I feel accomplished. I must have a really big smile on my face 'cause she is looking at me funny.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"No tell me."

"You're just cute is all."

"Cute? Did you seriously just call me cute?"

"Yeah. So?"

"No one has called me cute since second grade and I punched that boy in the face for doing so."

"So are you going to beat me up now?"

"No, I have a better idea." I tackle her lightly making her laugh. "Let's see how ticklish you are."

"No. Don't you dare." Her being serious is so sexy but it just temps me even more.

"Oh yes. I do dare. But first." I get off of her and she has a confused look on her face. I run into my bathroom and walk out to the sound of Kyla screaming like a baby.

"You didn't just do what I think you did, did you."

"Why yes, you would be quite correct."

"You're so mean!" Spencer throws a pillow at me. I seem to be everyone's target of flying objects.

"Okay she walked in on us. She so deserves it." She laughs a bit and I grab my guitar and strum it lightly my the back of my fingers before I out it away.

"We should get ready for school. It's almost eight."

"Right. School. Forgot about that." She gets off my bed and unlocks the door and I walk over to her and loosely place my arms around her waist as she places her arms around my neck. I place my lips firmly against hers before I let her go. I open the door and see Kyla standing furiously at my door with only a towel on.

"Have a nice shower?"

"I so hate you.

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**Yay for Spashly. RxR**


	14. OMG AUTHORS NOTE ONLY LOL SORRY

Okay guys sorry this is not a normal update but as readers of this fic you have the right to know what is going on as of now and what will be taking affect as soon as things are set up and ready to go. As of 10 this moring (7-12-09) I recieved a review that critigued my story as I have asked. This was what I was looking for and ended badly. Since around chapter 7 of this story it had been feeling like things were all over the place and there was no way to tie up lose ends unless I just cut them short with little detail to them and I really wasn't feeling much of it. This review only confirmed my feelings of this. I feel like as a writer I need to keep you guys happy and be able to finish this without a major cut off. So I have a list of any changes and goals i want to accoplish.

1. Thank you to all my readers and reviewers. it helps me so much and inspires me to write more. Coachkimm, .HEART., Spashley4eva93, just to name of a few.

2. This story will not be deleted but will not be updated as frequent for reasons listed below this.

3. A new story will be created as a replacement for this on or more like an alternative story basiced off of Chapter 1-5. This is going to be like my Second Chance.

4. I will be editing the first 5 chapters in the new story to add more detail and maybe explain things out a bit more. I just want to make this story the best it cam be for you guys.

5. The chapters will be named instead of numbered lol. Stupid but maybe it'll give it a littl more flavor and I'll stay on track better.

6. I have a type of ADD and OCD. This is why I have trouble staying on topic lol. You probably don't care but oh well you now know pointless information. lol.

7.** I am in search of an editor type deal. So if you want to read the update before anyone else, throw in your ideas, and correct my spelling this is you chance. Qualifications: Someone who is willing to stick with me on this as well as fix my spelling you you have to be decent at spelling lol. So I'm only wanting one and if you want this tell me a little bit about you in either a review or a message on here and why it should be you. Also you can email me at** **if it's easier for you. **I'm** just wanting the best person to help me with this so if you do email me and I don't get back sorry but please continue to read.**

8. I'm sorry for basically having this all over the place and the new story will be called, There's Gotta Be Something More unless it just doesn't fit an me and my future editor decide to change it but if anything I will let you know. Your guys support means much to me and I reall apperciate it. Thanks you guys and Hopefully once things are figured out I'll try to settle this crazy mess I like to call my first fan fic. lol. Have a good night you guys.


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